MySpace is horrifically ugly

(I posted this last night to my MySpace blog, but it really belongs here.)

What an ugly, disgusting piece of trash MySpace is. Just go look at a few MySpace pages and ask yourself, "Have I seen anything uglier than this?" Then tell yourself, "No. I've run over decomposing possum guts in the road that were rainbow waterfalls in comparison to this revolting MySpace." Even my own MySpace page is ugly, and yet there is so much more I could do to really ugly it up. I think MySpace must have an "Ugly Toolbar" so that you can turn your own little corner of internet ass from zit to diarrhea-splattered pig corpse in six easy clicks. Just think of forcing a chicken, an octopus, and a pregnant cat through a wood chipper and lighting the resultant gut smear on fire and trying to extinguish the fire with your own vomit. That's the *average* MySpace page. They typically get several hundred times more repugnant than that. I honestly think that head-butting a rusty saw blade with my naked cornea would be a more pleasant visual experience than viewing four, or even three, randomly chosen MySpace pages.

I also love how the awesome CSS positioning makes all the elements lay haphazardly across one another on MySpace pages. This is typical for any page designed with CSS positioning that isn't done by one of the few dweebs who know all ninety million CSS hacks necessary to do strange and exotic things like centering text and causing elements to line up with one another. MySpace may be a visual feast of colostomy bag drippings, but CSS positioning is evil, wrong, and stupid.